I live in a size that the world wants to put into a box. Let’s face it. Being a “fat girl” means that people make some assumption about me and every other woman of “size”. I thought that today should be the day that a few of the myths that I’ve heard or seen assumed about a big girl get kicked in the face.
1. You are fat because you’re lazy or have some sort of disease. Fun fact. I actually work out about 5 days a week just like most people. This summer I started doing the Couch Potato to 5K running plan, and I can walk farther now that I’ve been able to ever. I do have Cerebral Palsy, but that has zero bearing on my size. I don’t eat junk all of the time and the only thing I order from a drive through is generally a coffee. I know. You’re stunned that I’m not home stuffing my face full of Twinkies. But, really, even if I were diabetic or had some sort of issue, that’s not your business. I got my hips from my momma, and the problem with getting thinner is that a smaller waist just makes them look bigger. Go away.
2. Attractive men will never find you attractive. Here’s the thing, I hang with some pretty handsome dudes. I do. I’m talking about the head turners. I’ve walked into rooms with some of my guy friends and I’ve seen the response from women. It’s an interesting thing being arm candy for the Zac Efron, Channing Tatum competition of the world. (I wish that were an exaggeration but, it isn’t.) I’ve had skinnier girlfriends actually say things like “I don’t understand why a guy that looks like that hangs out with a girl that looks like you.” Needless to say, we are no longer friends. The thing that attracts the men in my life to me is my confidence and my heart for the world. I wouldn’t want to hang out with the ones that validated me because of my waist size anyway. People like what they like. My body is beautiful and changes every day, it’s not a fetish to love me.
3. Being a “fat girl” means that you have to settle. I have friends that try to set me up all of the time. Most of the time it’s with the cousin that’s way too into video games or the brother that doesn’t own more than two shirts. I don’t need your handouts. I’m fly all by myself. This is true for every person that I’ve ever met ever. Decide what you want, don’t settle for less than that.
4. You are Body Positive because you don’t have a choice. I know too many people who think that this mentality is okay. It isn’t. Understanding that I am handmade by a God who thinks that I’m gorgeous is the reason that Body Positivity is important to me and should be important to anyone of any size. This one body and this one life is all that you get and it’s happening right now and not when you’re a size two, or have bigger muscles or get married or anything. It’s right now.
It is hard sometimes to find anything about Body Positivity that doesn’t talk about the “Fat Girl Fetish” or the fact that being labeled “fat” suddenly means that you’re some type of deviant. Let me be real with you and tell you that I’ve had men approach me in the name of Fetishism as well as desperation, and I’ve had women tell me that I have “such a pretty face”. None of those things are fun for me. That’s not what I am built for. I am built to serve a God who loves me well and to worship a Savior that knew that I was worth it. Living, Working, Loving, Dating, Everything should be done in that mindset.