Stepping Outside of Your Social (Media) Circle.

I have 1,201 Facebook friends, a few hundred Twitter followers and a few hundred people that follow me on Instagram. I have friends all over the world. Social Media helps me to keep up with them, share life with them and encourage them in whatever endeavor. Social Media keeps us tied together. But, I only have a hand full of people that I call my real friends.

One of my best friends hides or untags every post I tag him in. There are no photos of us on Social Media anywhere together, and I’m pretty confident that he doesn’t know that I realize he does this. In fact, there are only two photos of us together anywhere, period. But, we’re still close. Why? Because, we talk nearly every day. M/p>

Actively seeking friendship is a gift. A gift that this friend along with a few of my others actually understands. When we’re in the same city, which is rare, he will drop everything to have a cup of coffee with me, or hug me at a gas station or eat a meal with me. He actively pursues our friendship and makes sure I know that I matter to him 100% of the time. But, from our social media interactions, people wouldn’t know that. They wouldn’t know that he knows the details about me and my story that most people don’t. He knows about the things that bring me life He knows that I actively hate side hugs. He knows that I love silly pop songs and really strong coffee. He didn’t learn any of that from social media.

A friend of mine from college was a featured photographer on Instagram. Her work is breathtakingly beautiful. Her life looks like a constant adventure and sometimes, I feel the need to compare my life to hers. But, I shouldn’t. Because, only about 8% of the time is she off on adventures, at concerts or doing something incredible. The rest of the time she’s just like me. She’s working and eating and sleeping and Netflixing. That’s just the reality. Everyone has moments that are exciting or beautiful or positively swoonworthy for social media. But, most of the time, even the flawless women on fashion blogs wear sweats and messy buns and lives in the land of makeuplessness and Ben and Jerry’s. Even in the mundane moments though, we have people who love us if we take the time to cultivate them. It is in the mundane moments. The sweatpants moments. The hot mess moments that we need love most.

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